JustPeachyNovels

Damie felt as if she heard the words Cesare had never said. After confirming the direction he indicated, she turned around.

The sticky gaze following her seemed to constrict her ankles. Damie hurried toward the garden as if to shake it off. She knew Reusten manor inside out, having often visited it since childhood.

She crossed the rose-filled flower bed, rounded the mansion’s corner, and passed the fountain with the angel statue. Finally, she stopped in front of a beautiful pond and looked up. There, above the star-filled lake, stood a young man with blue hair on the second-floor balcony.

“Kael.”

Damie cautiously called the name of the man she had secretly loved for ten years. He, dressed in his pristine knightly robes, turned to look at her. Upon seeing Damie, his face lit up with a breezy smile.

“Damie? My goodness!”

Without a moment’s hesitation, Kael jumped over the railing. Despite the considerable height, he landed lightly. Rising to his feet, he looked down at Damie with a gentle rebuke.

“It’s been a while. Why didn’t you write to me?”

“Just… I had some things going on.”

A sad smile appeared on Damie’s face. After hearing that Kael was to become a holy knight, she had fallen into a deep sense of loss. In such a state, she couldn’t face Kael with the same ‘childhood friend’ demeanor as before.

“I see. You haven’t come to visit like you used to. I was worried something might have happened.”

Kael’s warm voice reached her ears. Though somewhat indecisive, Kael was kind-hearted. Damie had loved him for so long because of the warmth his smile gave her.

Damie looked up at him without a word. His tone was one of feigned disappointment, but Kael’s face was smiling pleasantly down at her. This made it all the clearer to her that she wasn’t that important to him.

“You heard the news, right? I passed the entrance test for the holy knights. It’s like a dream come true that I’ll be a part of the Holy Guardian. I want to complete my training as soon as possible and head south to purify the ‘corruption’ rampant there. To aid the frail Saintess struggling on her own.”

Kael’s grey eyes were filled with anticipation for a new future. In those eyes, brimming with admiration for the Saintess, there was no room for Damie. The realization slowly, cruelly tore Damie’s heart.

“But at least you came to my farewell party today. I’m truly honored, Lady Damie! Even after dedicating myself to the clergy, I will never forget this kindness.”

Kael made the sign of the cross and bowed, a typical knight’s gesture. Though done in jest, it suited his princely appearance. The knightly uniform and formal greeting all seemed perfectly fitting.

Damie’s eyes clouded over as she watched. According to church law, knights could not marry. Their loyalty and faith, meant to be dedicated solely to the deity, could not be compromised by affection.

Tomorrow, Kael would leave for the grand temple to be inducted as a knight. And Damie would lose her chance forever. She would never be his lover or wife.

Never.

“Kael.”

With a heart as if spitting blood, she called his name.

“Huh? What’s wrong, Damie? Why do you look like that?”

Even in this situation, the dull-witted Kael still smiled brightly. He couldn’t imagine what was about to come out of her mouth.

She couldn’t let Kael go without confessing. Damie knew herself well. Her long-suppressed love had festered painfully, and if she didn’t express it, it would surely turn into a deadly poison.

“…You once asked me, Kael, why I didn’t date.”

“Hmm? Oh, yeah. I think I remember. Didn’t you say there was someone you liked?”

Kael, after pondering for a moment, nodded as if recalling it. Then he met Damie’s earnest gaze. For a moment, he was captivated by her beautiful eyes, then his face hardened with sudden realization.

“No way! Damie, the person you said you liked… could it be…?”

“Yes.”

Damie, who was known as the most beautiful woman in the North, confessed, but Kael’s face showed no joy. Instead, it twisted in surprise and guilt, as if he were being punished.

Damie couldn’t miss this. She barely swallowed the hot tears welling up inside. The taste of rejection in her mouth was so bitter that her face twisted involuntarily. But she forced herself to open her heart.

“The person I like is you, Kael Reusten. I’ve always liked you.”

Kael’s silence fell like lead. Damie looked down in despair, feeling like an executioner awaiting her beheading.

“I’m sorry, Damie. I didn’t… I didn’t know, all this time… I’m really sorry.”

Finally, an apology slipped from his mouth. Kael, flustered, stammered.

“As you know, I’m becoming a knight… and you know knights can’t marry.”

“Right.”

Damie replied, her eyes unfocused. She clearly saw him taking a step back, as if wanting to flee immediately. It was a rejection more evident than words.

“It’s not that I dislike you, Damie. Really. But it’s so sudden, and I have dreams… I can’t give them up now. I’m sorry, Damie.”

“I understand. So please, stop now, Kael.”

“…Still, I’m sorry.”

Is there anything more miserable than hearing constant apologies from the one you confessed to? She heard the sound of her heart shattering. Before the tears could fall, Damie closed her eyes tightly and whispered.

“It’s okay. You don’t need to apologize to me. It’s not your fault that you don’t love me.”

“Damie, it’s not like that, I…”

“Just go, please? I want to be alone for a moment. I’m begging you.”

Thanks to her desperate effort, Damie’s voice was relatively calm. Even so, Kael couldn’t leave her easily. Considering his kind nature, it was to be expected.

“Damie… I’m not just saying this, but you’re really a good woman. If you look around, you’ll find someone who will like you.”

Kael’s words, though well-intended, were poorly directed. Telling a woman who had loved him for ten years to find another man! It was a consolation better left unsaid.

Whether she continued to love Kael or decided to move on was Damie’s choice. It wasn’t for him to dictate. Moreover, with Cesare’s manipulative influence, ‘another person’ Kael meant was likely Cesare.

Damie felt she would end up crying and showing an ugly side to Kael if this continued. So she forced herself to speak firmly.

“Please, Kael! I get it, so don’t make me feel worse. Just go!”

In the end, her words were mixed with tears. The effect was immediate, surprising Kael as if he had been burned, making him step back.

Damie, finally making him leave, turned her back. Kael hesitated, wondering if he should go, but the rejection from her slender back was clear. Coupled with the burden of having just rejected her confession, Kael finally lost the courage to approach.

“…Forget about someone like me as soon as you can.”

Kael murmured, his face twisted as if he would cry, then turned and hurried away from Damie.

Damie heard his footsteps fading, curling up. It was the sound of her long-held love breaking. The sound of Kael stepping on the shards of her shattered heart as he left.

She had loved him for ten years. Since the day he had wiped her tears with his tiny hands and handed her a treasured little glass bead, calling it a treasure.

Back then, Damie was the most important person to Kael. But not now, ten years later. Kael had kindly but painfully reminded her of that.

‘Find someone good for yourself as soon as you can?’

Damie, crying, recalled his parting words. They seemed to be for her but were really for him, to ease his guilt over rejecting her.

Thus, she felt even more miserable. She knew it was an unrequited love. But Kael’s attitude towards her confession was more irresponsible and cruel than she had imagined.

Damie whispered, struggling to suppress her trembling, tear-soaked body.

“If that’s what you want, Kael. So be it.”

As if hearing her words, she glimpsed the retreating figure of a man. Unfortunately, it wasn’t Kael.

‘Cesare…’

Through tear-stained eyes, she gazed at him. Though she only saw his back, she could imagine his satisfied smile, like a cat licking cream. Everything had gone according to plan, and he must have felt like he had already won her over.

Everything was tiresome now. Her long, festering love, Cesare’s cunning pressure, and herself for loving in vain.

Suddenly, she wished it would all just fall apart.

Episode 6 – Episode 8