Just when she thought she had finally adjusted, the emotions surged up again. Exhausted by the world of lies surrounding her, Tatiana pressed a hand to her heated forehead.
“Look over there. Isn’t that the Cartien….”
“My goodness. I can’t believe she has the nerve to show her face in the city.”
The whispers of those who recognized her buzzed around her ears like the wind. Walking aimlessly forward, Tatiana finally stopped in front of a newspaper stand.
“Ah…”
Only then did she realize the reason for all the cold treatment. Her red lips parted slightly. She wasn’t particularly surprised to learn that her mother had removed her from the Cartien Viscounty family registry. It was exactly the sort of thing her mother would do. But the portrait of Kainel Townsent displayed proudly beside her mother’s article, taking up half the page—even she had to cover her mouth at that.
| Kainel Townsent Denies His Love for Lady Tatiana. |
So this man alone was real after all.
Tatiana’s gaze blurred as she looked at the portrait of the man who stood proudly like a god of war within the newspaper. Should she be grateful that at least one person in her world full of lies was telling the truth? Or bitter that the truth was that he did not love her? Unable to withstand the intensity of those vivid red eyes, even through the newspaper print, Tatiana covered her eyes and suddenly let out a hollow laugh.
△▲△▲△
Inside the carriage returning to the Townsent estate, Tatiana sat in silence. Even after leaving the noisy streets of Lebron behind and entering the quiet outskirts where even estates grew sparse, her expression did not change. The occasional blink of her eyes was almost fascinating—as if she were a living doll.
“…….”
In one hand, she still held the newspaper she didn’t even know why she had bought. She felt nothing. Not from seeing Aileen in the city, not from hearing that her mother had publicly severed ties with her completely, and not even from the fact that by tomorrow night, she would be married.
‘Could there possibly be anything left capable of shocking me now?’
That alone was her comfort. The single fact that there was no one left in the world who could still hurt her heart was what kept Tatiana standing.
‘Yes. If this is the end, then maybe this much is bearable.’
Closing her eyes, she pressed her cheek against the freezing window frame, as though forcing herself to feel something.
Watching her worriedly, Anne reached out to drape a shawl over her shoulders—then suddenly cried out.
“M, My Lady! Look over there!”
“…Yes. I see it.”
There was no surprise in her tired eyes. Following Anne’s pointing finger, Tatiana saw the luxurious carriage outside, but her violet eyes remained calm.
A golden ship-shaped crest upon silver waves. It wasn’t unfamiliar.
Until just last month, it had adorned the carriage her eldest sister rode with her.
As she looked at the carriage of the Oberdeen Count family stopped right before the boundary where Kainel Townsent’s private lands began, Tatiana expressionlessly pulled the cord inside the carriage.
“Anne. Go ahead first. I’ll follow soon.”
“I’ll wait in the carriage. It’s already dark, and it’s still a fair distance to the estate from here.”
“Then I’ll walk.”
“My Lady!”
Anne looked horrified, as if she had heard something impossible. Tatiana laughed softly. Only after firmly ordering both Anne and the driver did the carriage carrying Anne finally depart for the Townsent estate. Watching the dense forest road that seemed ready to swallow the carriage whole, Tatiana slowly turned and walked toward the waiting carriage.
“…Tiara!”
“Eldest sister.”
Annesia nearly tumbled out of the carriage as she rushed toward Tatiana with both arms outstretched. Her haggard, swollen face was far removed from the composed eldest daughter of the Cartien family. Yet judging by her expression, the sight of her youngest sister shocked her even more.
“My goodness, look at your face, Tiara! What on earth happened to you….”
“What about me?”
“…….”
“Did you come all this way just to say that?”
Tatiana didn’t even have the energy to argue anymore. Seeing her force the corners of her lips upward while rubbing her forehead tiredly, Annesia’s restrained tears finally began to brim over.
“Stop this and get into the carriage.”
“Eldest sister.”
“Go stay at the villa on Leona Island for a while. Your brother-in-law has already prepared a ship at the harbor, so just rest there quietly until things calm down. Kitty and Vivi will handle the newspapers and the social circles, so you don’t need to worry.”
Annesia’s words sped up, desperate to take Tatiana away before anyone saw her. Her hands pushing at Tatiana’s shoulders grew firmer.
“Nothing bad will happen. So you don’t need to worry.”
“…Aren’t you the one worrying?”
“Tiara.”
“I understand what you’re trying to say, but I’m not going.”
The strength drained from Annesia’s hands as Tatiana gently removed them from herself.
She’s still angry.
Panicking, Annesia grabbed both of Tatiana’s arms tightly again.
“I know what you’re thinking. I’ll explain everything slowly, alright? But first.”
“That’s not it.”
“How is it not? Tiara, you’re not the kind of child who becomes stubborn over something like this. Please don’t do this. Once you come back from Leona Island, everything will be resolved. We have to act before it’s too late!”
Then Annesia noticed the newspaper in Tatiana’s hand, and her expression grew even more desperate.
“Your sister is begging you, alright? Your sisters will take care of everything. You just need to stay still. Nothing will go wrong….”
“Eldest sister, you know you sound exactly like Mother right now?”
“…….”
“See? Things are already going wrong.”
Tatiana quietly smiled at the sight of Annesia freezing in shock. Facing her eldest sister, who stood speechless, Tatiana slowly shook her head.
“At first, I was really angry with all of you. No… maybe I still am.”
“…Tiara.”
“But that’s not why I’m doing this.”
“Then what is it? Don’t tell me it’s because of that man?”
“I finally learned how miserable and painful it is when someone you trusted turns their back on you. Knowing that, how could I do the same thing to someone else?”
Even if she didn’t know how much that man truly trusted her. Bitterness spread through Tatiana’s smile, but she soon straightened her shoulders.
“I don’t want to knowingly repeat something wrong. I’m the one who dragged him into this.”
“You read the newspaper, didn’t you? Don’t you know what that man said? He told Mother he didn’t love you!”
“And you sisters always said you loved me.”
“…….”
Annesia shook her head helplessly. Perhaps she already understood that once Tatiana became like this, there was no changing her mind.
Though she looked as if she might burst into tears at any second, Annesia tightly grasped her younger sister’s hand.
“T, Tiara. We only tried to send you to the Atlas Ducal House because—”
“I know. I don’t think you pushed this marriage for the family’s benefit. Alexei isn’t merely the Empress’s nephew or a wealthy Suke. He doesn’t even have siblings to fight over inheritance with, so there wouldn’t be troublesome disputes.”
“Exactly. So—”
“But you know. I’ve never once hated or regretted having so many older sisters.”
“…….”
“Not even now. Even now, when I resent all of you so much.”
Tatiana stepped back, saying she truly had to go now. Unable even to follow after her, Annesia stood there with empty eyes. Turning her head quickly to hide the tears blurring her vision, Tatiana walked away. Behind her, she heard the sound of her sister collapsing as if crying but she never looked back.
“…….”
Even as night fully settled in, she didn’t hesitate. Leaning into the misty darkness, Tatiana drew in a deep, heated breath. How long had it been since she decided never to seek sincerity from anyone else again? And yet, the fact that her eldest sister had come for her made her unbearably happy. That weakness embarrassed her.
‘When did I become this fragile?’
As she stared blankly at the hands her sister had held, depression clouded Tatiana’s eyes. She was moved by her sister desperately trying to stop her but at the same time, endlessly saddened by the realization that what her sister wished to hold onto was not the current Tatiana, but the obedient, ignorant youngest sister from the past.
And saddest of all was the fact that even knowing that, her heart had still wavered. If she had never summoned that man to the imperial palace, would she now be sitting comfortably in that carriage?
Back in the same old place where nothing had changed?
“Tatiana!”
Lost in thought, staring unfocused at her own hands, Tatiana lifted her head at the sound calling her name. It wasn’t a hallucination. Halfway down the foggy forest road stood the large silhouette of a man. Tatiana narrowed her eyes and blinked.
“Kainel?”
She didn’t need to approach to know who it was. The estate was still far away, yet she recognized him immediately. Part of her found it strange how accustomed she had become to him. Another part of her chest tightened painfully.
Step by step, as the distance between them closed, Tatiana struggled to find words. Only once his face became visible did she finally tilt her head as if nothing were wrong.
“I sent Anne ahead already. Didn’t you see her? Why did you come all the way here?”
“Your sister came, didn’t she?”
“…….”
Before she could even finish responding, Kainel closed the remaining distance between them. His cold red eyes glared into the darkness behind her.
“Why now? Don’t tell me she came to grab you and run away before it’s too late.”
“…It wasn’t like that.”
“Then what was it?”
Why is he so perceptive? No, more than that, why did he look so angry?
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